(from 5/24/04)
Wow! Some weekend. World Series of Poker in Las Vegas and meeting Mannix in person.
First some business to take care of:
Sorry to the guy at the coffee shop I lied to Thursday morning when he said I looked like Larry Wachs of the Regular Guys. I told him I hear that a lot but I wasn't me, and, well...sorry. I was running late for the airport.
My old pal Tim Conway Jr. got married on Sunday. Good times. Food was good, Malibu Dan came through, and it's always fun when you can watch Harvey Korman eat.
Although I was there mainly because of the free food and booze and seeing the great Mike Connors of "Mannix" fame,
----------------------------------------------------
As of this writing on Monday evening, Cousin Sal is still alive in the World Series of Poker 2004 at the Horseshoe in 1940's Las Vegas.
He's leading such card sharks as Laura Prepon of THAT 70s SHOW!
Top prize this year is over $5 million, and the tourney has gone from 800+ last year to 2000+ this year because of the Hollywood hipsters and ESPN. If you're not playing poker by now buddy, well then...you might as well join yesterday's cigar smokers.
Looking around the poker room at Binion's crowded with all the social retards and out and out scumbags and grifters, one has to wonder if all the episodes of Star Trek have been lost or the last comic book store has been shuttered. How many of these guys ran backgammon tip sheets in the 80s?
But there's no denying that this thing has gotten huge and fun. Where else can you be introduced to "Poker Humorist" Max Shapiro? OY!
POKER HUMORIST MAX SHAPIRO
Cousin Sal is hanging in there long after the Moneymakers and Varkonyls have been eliminated. He's the new Chris Moneymaker perhaps, coming out of nowhere to be placed at the head of the pokerati table. All hail Sal Troublemaker! I still can't get him on the phone so that's a good sign he's still in.
We landed Thursday night for the next day's practice tournament (in which Sal came in 13th out of 200), and immediately the cab driver recognized Sal.
"You Jimmy Kimbels, brother, Cousin Sal, man!" It's a tiny subcultural curiosity now bubbling up from the West Coast. Black people all over the US pronounce "Kimmel" "Kimble." No one knows why. Does one need to "axe?" Even the most liberal writers on the staff have acknowledged this phenomenon.
But the cabbie was a huge fan of the show, clearly, and he recited bits that Sal had done and was very excited and it was a sweet moment but then Sal let a giant fart in the cab......
I don't think passing gas is generally the way one is supposed to greet an admirer--yours truly has only done it upon request--but damned if it didn't work.
"You let the big bomb, man! Oh my god. Damn! Cousin Sal, you just as filthy as on TV! I love it!"
Some people know their audience.
And I'm beginning to think that all Las Vegas cab drivers are assigned a personal gambling saga by the government. After the stink abated, our cabbie told us how he came to town with nothing and parlayed some football bets into a $150,000 and a new house. Yeah? So why the cab, pal?
Two years ago, one told us how much he won at roulette and lost it all to drugs, which is unbelievably not true because drugs don't cost that much. Drugs make you buy expensive toys and women, but the drugs themselves are pretty easy to afford when you've won the alleged amounts these cab drivers claim.
Anyway, they make you want to gamble more, so I guess it works. Do you think the mayor of Las Vegas and former mob attorney Oscar Goodman would allow his city's stable of livery workers to tell lurid, discouraging gambling stories? Not on your life. This is a guy who will do anything for positive Vegas PR, even if it means posing for pictures with any pervert or stoner that asks.
" NICE TO MEETCHA, HARRY."
