I was pleased and delighted to open up my morning paper and NOT see myself being associated with THIS story about liberal darling, Don Imus. Well, the online edition that you see on the link does make the association, but the paper editors deleted it, whether due to space limitations or recognizing lousy journalism, I don't know. Maybe they just took it out of the copy earmarked for delivery to my house.
Here's the stupid and irritating paragraph from the Imus in the Woodshed Saga as reported by my old pals Rodney and Phil over at a daily Atlanta paper.
Somewhat closer to Imus's case, radio shock jock Doug Tracht, known as the Greaseman, was suspended for racist comments several years ago, then re-instated, then later fired from another station for more racist comments. And in Atlanta, the "Regular Guys" were fired from 96rock last year after they taped sister-station Hispanic disc jockeys without their knowledge and then mocked them on-air.
Huh? Wha? That story has absolutely not the slightest resemblance to the Rapmaster Imus incident. Oh, white light, take me already!
Old material, gents. Where's the followup from you social dividers? That anti-Wachs spin has been refuted by the law and common sense for sometime now. I even recently settled my differences with the wonderful people at Clear Channel as well as with those cuddly bilingual DJs, and we're all very happy with the peaceful outcome of that. Where's the followup? Isn't that the definition of "news?" When something new happens? For a bunch that whine and cry when people are not getting along, news reporters sure have a knack for ignoring it when everyone finally shakes hands and hugs.
Good god, this malarkey is even picked up in the Austin-American Statesman! Why would anyone in Austin want to get the scoop on Imus through the lens of Atlanta? Do they have no reporters in Austin? Can they not get NY numbers on their Austin telephones? Thanks a lot, lazy looky-loo "journalists."
Let me also hasten to point out for the record, that I do not think the Rutgers Basketball Chicks are a bunch of nappy-headed prostitutes whatsoever. They wear their Carhart flannels just like you and me. They are proud women, and they should be praised for their bravery on the court battling team after team of heterosexual female basketball players from intolerant right-wing schools like Yale, Vassar, and Sarah Lawrence. That takes guts.
To believe that Rapmaster Imus actually harmed anyone is to believe that the Rutgers FemiFives even know or care who Imus is. Oh, you really think that the RutGerlz set their alarm clocks daily to wake up with Imus and his political roundtable, do ya? Well if that's the case, I say that they play hip-hop, the musical religion of peace, in Imus' 2-week absence. Wouldn't want to disappoint his growing audience of female teen basketball players.
The Imus calculation was classic. Appease critics and bask in the new found dignity that comes with pleading guilty to crimes not committed. Man, you know you're in trouble when Cal Ripken cancels on you, and who wouldn't want to repair that damage?
Maybe all will be well after his 2-week cool down vacation at his dude ranch for wayward dudes, and maybe the buzz from this incident results in interest in the show from other than it's usual clique of NY and DC high dollar political insiders. What is certain, is that going on Al Sharpton's show and not taking full advantage of the opportunity to turn the tables on this swaggering, self-righteous eggplant is very sad for all broadcasters and for race relations in general.
Uh-oh. Don't look now, but the Floating Head of Disapproval is looking over my shoulder as I write this hateful screed.
What would Wachs have said (WWWHS)? Well, Floating Head, I think Imus was onto something when he said, "We're a comedy show...sometimes we go too far." Let's advance that idea a step further.
"So Al, you understand how that can be. Everyone knows how fun it is to smear feces on teenage girls and tell them to say that white men did it. That's always a good time. But people got hurt. Remember? You went a little too far, but it worked out for the best. People got over it. We can look back and smile.
Or how about the time you got on a bullhorn and told people it would be kinda fun to burn down Jewish-owned buildings. Good times. You're out there doing your thing, being a bigoted reverend, registering homeless to vote and get reparations and all, and then BOOM! All of a sudden Freddy's Fashion Mart is in ashes and people are killed. You didn't mean any harm. Everyone evetually got over that one."
I was surprised when Cryptkeeper Imus apologized so profusely because, well, I assumed that Imus was already clinically dead, kept alive by some mechanical means or digital puppetry. And logically, if I were also 80, and had had my last rites administered on several occasions, had money, and a ranch of tender young things at home, I certainly would consider blazing up the ole middle fingers to the outrage brokers and call it a career. Imus Shrugged. What's with the mad career preservation scramble? That's for younger, funnier commentators. First liquor and coke, now power, drawn from interviewing political celebs, that the I-Pimp can't get enough of.