Here are some news stories that caught my eye today. I call this, The News Jog! DUN-DUN-DUN!!! I know that other people claim to have the News Jog, but I thought it up originally and mine has a cool music staging at the end of it. DUN-DUN-DUN!!!! That's how people know they have the Real Original News Jog the way it was meant to be done with unabashed prejudice and bigotry.
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid vowed on Wednesday to block former Solicitor General Theodore Olson from becoming attorney general if President George W. Bush nominates him to replace Alberto Gonzales.
"He's a partisan, and the last thing we need as an attorney general is a partisan," Reid told Reuters in a brief hallway interview on Capitol Hill.
Oh, and what are you, Harry? A neutral referee? May I suppose that when your dominatrix, Hillary, becomes president, every cabinet post will be filled with Republicans? If I were the president, here's one thing I would do. Well, two things if you count hanging Harry Reid for siding with our enemies at every opportunity. Why not nominate Harry Reid as the new Attorney General, and then pile up his workload with things he hates such as authorizing wiretaps against Al Qaeda? He would wind up fired or resigning in disgrace and humliation. Maybe a suicide in Marcy Park. Show him who's boss, Bush.
Finally, some good news from that region. Only six people dead! Usually they have 6000 or some ridiculous number in these 3rd and 4th world nations whenever the wind gets above 50mph. Six. Not bad, Indonesia. Making progress. Saved me $50 in Red Cross money.
A McDonald's worker put too much salt on a Big N' Tasty burger that was served to a Union City police officer who got sick and was briefly hospitalized.
The worker, Kendra Bull, 20, was arrested, handcuffed, charged with reckless conduct at 1:30 a.m. and spent the rest of the night in lock-up. Later Friday morning, after a court hearing, she was released on $1,000 bond.
I wonder what would have happened if the cop ordered a Big 'n Salty, and this gal made it tasty by accident.
The cop's being a dick and the law was grossly misapplied, but I say give him a raise. Seriously, it's irritating enough to be served a fucked up burger, but to be served a fucked-up burger by this.....
....think of how pissed you'd be. What happened, honey? Someone stab you in the mouth with a tooth and you were distracted from your salting duties? Is it really that difficult to salt meat? Thank you, minimum wage!
"I think they went too far with it," said Bull, who has worked at the McDonald's on Jonesboro Road for about five months. "If it was too salty, why did [the officer] not just take one bite and throw it away? Why did he take eight bites and finish it and come back later and say it made him sick?"
Because you're an ugly hamster, that's why. Let's review.
When you look like this, it really is immaterial how good or bad the burger is. The customer has already lost his appetite. So while, yes, Kendra, you are correct that he took enough bites to indicate that excessive salt was not an issue, his hospital visit was more than likely the result of excessive ugliness on the part of the sandwich preparer (you) which put this police officer over the top.
Now, people. I know from personal experience that after getting a sandwich slathered in mayo after I've told the drive-thru shitnozzle 4 times "NO MAYO, Please!" through the Thomas Edison Memorial speaker--what are they making wax cylinders of your order back there?--I'm ready to kill.
Now add a badge and a gun to that feeling, and you'd do something about your salty burger too, if you were a cop. And she only went to jail for a little bit, and it wasn't like she wasn't going to end up there anyway someday soon, because how far can you get in the world of business and commerce with a busted fang hanging from your lip?
I'll tell ya what. The problem is that fucking liberal Mayor McCheese. He's so soft on crime. I hate these pasteurized processed candidates our system gives us.