MORE CHICKENS

I wish Gen. Daniel Petraeus could have been at Hooters with me, last week, before the Senate surge against American interests held their annual hostage taking with him as guest victim. Apparently, the surge is working a little too well, and certain senators with the presidency on their mind wanted some snappy answers as to why American defeat was not imminent.

While the good General did a fine job of helping the anti-war wing of the Senate look foolish and myopic again, I thought he would have been a lot better off eating wings and polishing off a pitcher or two with me before going to face the wolves. He would have found a good argument for war there.

I was recently honored to be asked to judge a Hooters bikini pageant. It gave me that Hasselhoff feeling, and I thank the organizers of the pageant. A striking girl of about 23 took the stage to showcase her swimsuit and plastic surgeries for the adoring crowd of priapitics. She was a Vietnamese/African American mix, and her beauty made me wonder if Vietnam was really that much of a quagmire after all.

Mark my words. A generation from now we will be marveling at the beauty of Iraqi-American strumpets with daddy issues, strutting their Weapons of Male Destruction on a riser under a tent somewhere in America on a Friday night. Anti-Iraq protestors will return to their roots as grumpy, unrequited feminists with misspelled placards and get back to some good old fashioned male bashing, and we will all finally understand why we were in Iraq, winning.

The week of political Tourette’s didn’t stop there. It was the anti-flamers who were running around San Francisco this time, indulging into the left's favorite new diversion of capturing the Olympic Torch.

FREE TIBET! the anarchists other unmedicated bipolars running around Golden Gate Park screamed. Darfur is the new Global Cooling.

Don't be fooled. This is just a dress rehearsal for the Democratic convention in Denver, where the depressed and desperate will attempt to rekindle the race riots not experienced since the days when liberalism and it's destructive winds of hope and change were just a gentle breeze.

After that, it's a short microbus trip up to Vail, just in time for the annual ski lodge burning season.

Why does anyone on the left wish to FREE TIBET!? Objectively speaking, Tibet is a theocracy run by a charismatic and exotic dictator, the Dalai Lama. Tibet is not a republic. Its own people are not diverse. There is censorship from within and few, if any, of the personal freedoms that we take for granted.

They also have boy kings. Well, we did too, but Lou Pearlman is in jail, and Nick Lachey got dumped, so our domestic boy king nightmare of the late 90s has been solved.

It doesn't require much imagination to see the problems a nation could have when it wants to mobilize against a predator and its leader is 11 years old. The best outcome one could hope for would be that China accepts a game of Halo to decide who lives and dies.

So it's puzzling to me that a Richard Gere, for example, who is remarkably consistent when it comes to giving the sour lemon face for every line reading in every movie role he takes on, would be so contradictory when it comes to his pets in Tibet. Why THAT theocracy?

How quick were the Tibet Freedom and Torch Snuffers Union to defend Koresh and the Branch Dividians when they were under siege by our separated-from-church state? I think almost 1 person may have protested.

It's almost reflexive, here in our purple states, that when a politician, usually in the Republican party, mentions that their faith may have, on background, in some Zen-like way, have had an influence on their decision-making process in government, the left breaks the glass on the theocracy alarm and readies the bastille with non-lethal beanbag firing arms to ward off the coming neo-Crusades.

It all reminds me of the scene in the Godfather in which the 5 Families get together to discuss this business of narcotics...which is a dirty business. But despite the grumblings from those not already with a piece of the pie, it is resolved: No drug sales near schools or children. Ideally, which is the way most criminal enterprises start out; it would be sold in the black neighborhoods. It's decided that, since this is indisputably where animals live, they have no souls worth saving.

Similarly, the Clinton Crime Family and the Obama Gang have decided that theocracies are OK... in Iraq, Iran, and now, China. After all, China is slowly turning away from Communism, the beloved religion of statists everywhere. They're animals. Let them lose their souls.

Comments

[FJ]

Amen brother!

It doesn't make any sense the whole Free Tibet thing. And Darfur? Why do the hippies care? They are all animals. Oh yeah now what about the polygamists in Eldorado, Texas?

[Kelly]

See..this is what is so fucked up...this was a fucking excellent post. I wish I could write something like this...laughing..but seriously..the point, was indeed pointy, although I never disagree, you make such good points. I see why you do what you do..you have to draw the masses...plain common sense does not do it. How sad indeed for the state of our union.